The Best Sex for Life by Weerakoon Patricia

Author:Weerakoon, Patricia [Weerakoon, Patricia]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Growing Faith
Published: 2016-08-17T16:00:00+00:00

2. Sexual intimacy in marriage turns commitment into brain bonding

When a couple stay together, they move from the crazy romantic love phase through the less crazy ‘passional’ phase and then into a less emotional but infinitely deeper commitment phase. 59 As man and woman, we are created for long-term relationships and God gives us a brain mechanism for this. This phase of a couple’s relationship is characterised by feelings of trust, calm, security, social comfort and emotional union. The neural circuitry of this brain system has been associated primarily with neuropeptides, oxytocin and vasopressin. These ‘cuddle hormones’ increase with any form of intimacy between the couple. An orgasm sends oxytocin levels through the roof. This shared intimacy of a long-term union brings lovers closer together, potentially triggering a ‘virtuous’ cycle: the more you make love, the closer you feel, and the closer you feel, the more you make love. And so on. No wonder the writer of the Proverbs encourages a young man to be not just satisfied but intoxicated.

Drink water from your own cistern, running water from your own well. Should your springs overflow in the streets, your streams of water in the public squares? Let them be yours alone, never to be shared with strangers. May your fountain be blessed, and may you rejoice in the wife of your youth. A loving doe, a graceful deer—may her breasts satisfy you always, may you ever be intoxicated with her love. (Proverbs 5:15–19)

This is the kind of bond that keeps you together after the young blush of romance described in Song of Songs is past and your body is gravity-challenged. When you and your partner are wrinkled and sagging and the athletic lovemaking of your youth is a distant memory (Ecclesiastes 12), your love for each other and your commitment to your marriage will be stronger than it ever was.

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